Verbal threats of grievous bodily harm…

The only thing that makes beat-em-up blow-em-up macho movies worth the time it takes to watch their gap-infested story lines and content poor dialogue, are those once-in-a-while one-liner threats of grievous bodily harm. My favorite of the week went something like this…”If you don’t (act of life-threatening stupidity), I’m going to shove my fist so far down  your throat that you’ll taste my armpit hairs.” Such charm, such class!

Not that I am opposed to macho action movies at all! I am quite open minded when it comes to movies with eclectic tastes that range from the big blockbuster right down to little indie art house films, foreign language films and Aussie classics, black and white, Western, Anime and musicals. There is very little I won’t consider watching (though I am ruthless with junk- a movie gets ten minutes from me and if it is rubbish, it gets the flick- I have wasted too many hours watching movies that really shouldn’t have made it off the cutting room floor!), though I have never managed to venture into the horror genre much! I don’t like to be frightened- ever! I’m not talking about that biting your nails feeling you get when you watch an edge-of-your-seat thriller like “Shutter Island” or “Dead Again” but the fear-mongering horror movies that make you afraid to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night- I hate those. They don’t even get a look in!

There are some movies I’ll watch just because an actor is in them….Kenneth Brannagh, Emma Thompson, Meryl Streep, James MacEvoy, Cate Blanchette, Daniel Autieul, Leonardo DiCaprio, Tom Hanks, Colin Firth, Juliette Binoche, Tim Robbins, Denzel Washington, Kristen Scott Thomas (she’s done some great French movies too!), Geoffrey Rush, Judy Dench, Maggie Smith, Audrey Tatou, Rhys Ifans, Hugh Jackman, Sean Penn, Johnny Depp….people who are good at their craft, who speak the language of story telling, who suck you in until you have forgotten that the gay statesman he played in the last movie is the same person who is watching his family fall apart in the one you’re watching tonight, that the South African running around in the bush last year is the same as the middle-class suburban salesman whose life is imploding in front of him or the mental patient whose life is a fantasy. There are dozens more who usually deliver and hundreds of others who are perfect for those specific genre movies that you need on a Friday night with friends, or for a family movie on a rainy saturday afternoon.

I watch dozens of them! I have foresworn television and it’s 40 minute mini-plots and rehashed story lines and EXCESSIVE advertising. The two Tv shows I do enjoy, I watch online or when they come out on DVD. I do have to wait a bit longer to see them, but no cliffhangers….no adverts! Seems like a fair trade off to me. And there are plenty of movies to watch in the meantime…for free…

…because, like my other passion, they are freely available to borrow from my local library. I can borrow one for every night of the week (which I frequently do) from any one of five or six categories. My Local has a fantastic selection of foreign films as well as Hollywood dollar-earners. Anime, they’ve got it. Swedish cult movies…got it (I saw the original “Let the right one in” before “Let me in” was released in Hollywood) I use the online catalogue to get in early and reserve the ones I want to watch and they send me a nice little SMS to tell me my ship(disc) has come in and voila….new release DVD’s at my fingertips. They even have Blu-Ray! AND NO ADVERTS! And it’s legal…because we all know that ‘Australia makes great movies and what we’re really burning is the future of our movie industry.’ 🙂

So what about you? Do you love movies? What are your faves? Any recommendations? This week I was really impressed by ‘Trans America’, the first movie I’ve seen where a female actress played a male playing a woman…it was thought-provoking and heart-wrenchin, and controversial..but I’m cool with that…thinking happens to be one of my favorite past-times….they say it helps prevent Dementia in later life…if only I could remember what I was talking about…


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. embejo
    May 28, 2011 @ 14:39:59

    I recently watched a French film called Amelie. It was quirky and odd and funny and clever and arty. It would drive my husband, my brother, and more than likely your husband mental, so I think you’d enjoy it. Here’s the wiki:

    (Caveat: there’s an orgasm scene of the sort you’d never want to watch with your mother.)



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